2012

i thought it was about bloody time i came to say 'happy 2012'. i overshot the 'happy new year' welcome by a mile and reckoned i'd better acknowledge 2012 before january passes us by. i 'just' made it huh.

so to bring you up to date;

*christmas*

we had the pleasure of cooking for my family [ma p, sister & beau] on xmas day and served our attempt at jamie oliver's turkey wellington [pictured above]. we lost quite a bit of the cranberry stuffing but the turkey was so DAMN moist it didn't matter. i've never enjoyed turkey so much in my life and it was well worth the time and effort preparing. i'd be tempted to have another go next christmas.

then we moseyed on up to leeds to spend boxing day with the barker clan. that was one crazy/loud/stressful/hectic/lovely day. the noise, volume of people and child orientated frenzy sent me into a bit of a panic. it got me to thinking what on earth will we do next christmas when we will have [what will then be] a 6 month old to take charge of. the noise and chaos was too much for me to bear so i think simplicity is going to be key for 2012. that or we do a runner and hide in a log cabin somewhere..

in between xmas and new year we managed to fit in a mini cruise to bruges [our 2nd time aboard the Pride of York]. bruges remains a beautiful place to visit - we really love bruges - but it was so damn busy and traipsing around crowds of people, fairly heavily pregnant whilst NOT being able to enjoy the best bit of bruges [the beer] left us feeling a little frazzled. we'd go again and again in a heartbeat but perhaps not at that time of year and maybe without a little bubba in my belly..

*new year*

was a very dignified event spent with a couple of friends and their wee child. it was a sober [for me] and quiet affair with a place to rest my increasingly heavy body. however, i didn't manage to get the 'hangover free' feeling i was after after we were kept awake till the very early hours by the neighbours having an obscenely loud classical music party. i did not expect to be kept awake by pavarotti on repeat on NYE and was rather disgruntled when i woke up feeling as rough as i would have had i been partaking in the booze.

exhausted, we returned home ready to cabbage ourselves on the sofa for a week, when we were disturbed by my dear husband having an interesting episode that resulted in a phone call to the NHS helpline and a trip to A&E. all turned out to be well and my boy wasn't dying after-all but he was diagnosed with experiencing anxiety attacks and has been quite disturbed by them ever since. we're working on getting him better and will prob post more on that laters!

*pregnancy*

i'm 28 weeks pregnant TODAY. all is going beautifully - thank the lord - and i'm genuinely enjoying this ride now and have been for some time. our baby is growing well and developing every day. the little beast kicks me with enthusiasm each day and i'm hooked on it. watching my belly expand at a rate of knots and seeing my bellybutton holding on for dear life is a little daunting but any of those fears are blown to smithereens as soon as the little one nudges me in the side or shoves a foot under my ribs [i'm not sure how it's managed to get up there so soon!].

we have booked in for a 4D scan which happens this friday coming and we're super excited to see our bebe again and see how much our tiny little dancer has developed.

i finish work in 6 weeks.

and. i got milk! yellow, scary, 'what the hell is that coming out of my nipples' milk! i honestly thought my nipples were rotting at first and the idea of stuff coming out my nipples felt a little alien to me but as mb rightly put it my body 'is getting ready to feed scrobble'. i'm ok with it now but the nipple pads might be making an early appearance if my milk glands keep up the good work.

bodies really are quite amazing and fascinating. especially the tiny little one nestled inside of mine.

*moving forward in 2012*

our plans to create our bebe's resting place in our home have begun and we're working on creating a space just for bebe b. it's a mix up of decorating, design and huge changes in our levels of home organisation. i'll be starting a series of posts very soon documenting our progress now that 'project nursery' has really begun. i'll be sharing some nursery inspiration, along with documenting our progress as we go and i cant wait to share. it's the most exciting and rewarding thing i've embarked on for a little while.

***

i hope everyone is having a brill 2012 so far. i for one am v excited about this magical year. :))

the things they dont tell you about pregnancy - part II week 16 - 26

image from e*airfuly via flickr

your baby's kicks can be felt in all manner of areas - some where other people wont be able to feel...no matter how much they ask - and this kind will startle you every time. the rest are awesome though and you'll more than likely develop an obsession with them - it's more addictive than crack. you'll bore your partner to death with it. no matter how much you try or how much they're digging the pregnancy thing, they just dont have the patience to sit there for hours on end waiting for the baby to do 'another huge kick'.. but when they do, oh their faces. such a delight to see papa b's face light up when his little boy or girl thumps him  in the palm of his hand.

bras will become your nemesis - your stomach will relocate to underneath your boobs and every time you eat you'll want to cry until you can remove your bra/all your clothes. it's painful, uncomfortable and irritates your new found relationship with heartburn. if you're lucky you'll escape this fate but my earlier [and rather hopeful] post about finally finding some suitable underwear was premature. i cannot find a bra that offers comfort, good fit AND any kind of sense of style. i aint talking victoria secrets style here - i'm not after much. if i could find a comfortable bra that fits i'd happily sack off any hope of style - but they're all horrendously uncomfortable. i'm even contemplating going commando in this department; it's getting that bad. and i aint talking about carrying around no fried eggs... it wont be pretty if i go down this route.

you'll put on weight - totes obvs right? well no. I mean, you won't necessarily be any fatter but you'll be heavier. you'll feel it too and if u have to travel up 3 flights of stairs multiple times in a day whilst at work [like me] it'll damn near kill you. babies, and all the stuff packed round em, are HEAVY and that extra 40-50% more blood you're pumping around your body is bloody knackering too.

you'll love your baby - deeply, before you even lay eyes on it. part of the wonders of being pregnant. you'll develop an affection and bond with your baby without ever having met it and it is truly amazing. and a blessing. one of the many perks of being pregnant. and there are perks. i promise.

your 2nd trimester will whizz by - enjoy it, do as many fun things with your boy as you can and document it all, especially your belly. it will creep up on you - and before you know it you'll be teetering on the edge of your third trimester - and that means BABY. like, soon!!

whingy wednesdays

This week has been tough. Not specifically pregnancy related, more likely to do with sheer exhaustion. I am officially ready for the Christmas break. Here are a few other contributing factors to my deathly bad mood this week -

*maternity underwear* I decided that I couldn't wait till new year before I invested in some new bras. I'd had a growth spurt and was becoming increasingly uncomfortable. Off I headed to Marks & Spencer's to be fitted properly, like a good pregnant woman does. I was handed a multitude of depressing bras, of which none fit. Finally I settled on a plain, dull and rather drab number that I thought would do to see me through Christmas. I was then informed by the assistant that I was leaving with a 34G bra. I walked in wearing a 32D! I met my husband after and cried. Not only was I wearing a parachute, I was wearing a hella ugly one, in the biggest size they offered. Where the hell was I to go from here with another 3 or so months of growth left in these badboys? To say I was depressed is an understatement. Thankfully my boy came to my rescue and purchased a few options from the much more pregnancy friendly figleaves.com. I'm pleased to say I'm now a much more manageable 34E -though bra shopping will never hold the same charm for me again as it did pre pregnancy.

*fading into the background* there's a good few months until I'm due to leave work but I already feel like I'm fading into the background. I don't know if I'm participating in the development of this but I do feel like people are beginning to forget about me already. It's a strange, melancholy feeling.

*stretch marks* I can feel my skin getting ready to rip. There's no real sign of damage as yet but my sides itch like hell and a can't get the cream in thick enough or fast enough to ease it. I'm preparing for the arrival of Mr & Mrs Stretchmarks any day now.

*restless legs* restless everything. Sleep has once again become disturbed, this time by restless or numb legs, achy ribs, sore belly a full bladder or a slightly over-zealous husband searching for cuddles (and being quite prepared to accept them from my pregnancy pillow). I'm waving goodbye to my sleep, round two.

*baby kicks* don't just occur in the stomach. That's all I need say there, except for boy does a kick of this kind startle you.

*2011* I'm just over this year. Except for the Christmas part, the rest can just do one already. I'm exceptionally tired, grumpy and ready for some respite. Thankfully mb and I are taking a little mini cruise to Bruges between Xmas and new year to recharge and chill. Shame I can't endulge in my favourite beverage while I'm there; Belgian beer.

*computers* my mac appears to have died a death. Fucking great.

Picture: portrait of myself by my delightful husband.

whingy wednesdays

image from here via pinterest 

here we are again with another very late-in-the-day whingy wednesday.  it's getting harder each week to find something to whinge about as i'm truly beginning to enjoy this pregnancy now. and what with christmas a mere 11 days away i'm brimming with excitement. i cant tell you how ready scrobble and i are for a few mince-pie-fuelled days off.

still i dont like to disappoint so i've rumbled up a few complaints from the depths of my christmas spirit:


*long distance friends* - all my best girlies live a variety of unmanageable distances away. from my girl in leeds who's gallavanting around vietnam with her new husband, to my girl over the top of the pennines with her sweet and inspirational family to my brit girl MOH currently residing [and working her ass off] in denmark. they're all so far away. and i do not get to see them half as much as i would like.

sharing my first pregnancy has been an experience i've been dying to share with them all and it's so difficult when the distances we are from each other really impact how often we get to see each other.

it's quickly coming up to a year since i saw my friend hazel in denmark and recent bad news implies that it's going to be some time till i see her again. we'll probably have our child here with us by then and in my book that aint sharing this experience at all. it's totally freakin bypassing it. it makes me sad but there aint nothin i can do about it but get on with it. i just know that when scrobble does arrive things will be just that bit harder still to get out there and see my girls. 

*underwear* you know your body is changing beyond recognition when your knickers dont fit over your hips anymore. sure i knew things would grow. i knew my trousers, tops and bras would need upgrading to allow for developments but my knickers, my KNICKERS. i had not considered this to be a potential threat. foolishly.

*the return of the dreaded tiredness* it could be my body winding down for christmas or it could be baby telling me to take it easy but boy am i tired again. i'm still having very restless nights sleep and the weight of my increasing uterus is evermore present at night when i fall onto my back in my slumber. it's so much harder than it sounds sleeping on your side. all. the. time. i wake up often with a very peculiar sensation in my legs and stomach that is really impossible to describe, other than to say it feels wrong. your body is clever enough to wake you to tell you to shift over, it just renders you knackered in the process.

getting to grips with my wardrobe

image from here via pinterest

HURRAY!!!!!

finally! i'm beginning to get to grips with my wardrobe. i went through a totally awkward phase where i was neither thin, pregnant nor fat but with huge mammaries. a difficult physique to dress, or so i thought. i was in denial about the size of my belly but really want to emphasize it as otherwise i just felt frumpy and pretty miserable.

it took many a trip to the shopping mall to get it right. but eventually i did. i ended up coming away with a selection a stretchy items that have room for me to grow into, rather than totally-horrendously-ill-fitting maternity wear. i genuinely dont think i'll be wearing maternity trousers until i reach 7 months or so....[we'll see how that plan transpires].

skirts and stretchy dresses and belts are by far my favourite combo. easy to put together and, more importantly, comfortable. no pregnant woman wants to look like she feels but she CERTAINLY does not want to be uncomfortable. your tiny baby wont allow it.

my advice to any woman struggling with their pregnancy wardrobe;

• jersey, jersey jersey. 
• forget maternity tops - FORGET them. waste of money. truly. there's so many loose fit tops and blouses out there that you can wear for the duration - they literally aren't worth the investment.
• hold off wearing maternity trousers as long as you can - they fit and feel weird. you're better off with dresses.
• belts - hoik in that waist ladies. while you still have it.
• maternity tights - get them. NOW. regardless of your size. you wont look back - so so SO comfy.

it took me so long to put this post together that i've since grown and definitely need to address the maternity underwear situation soon but i am trying to postpone this till the new year. i'm not ready [and cant afford] to go up a cup size for the third time in as many months. thankfully, my recent purchases have enough stretch in them to last another few weeks.

fingers crossed.

xoxo

whingy wednesdays

 image via Peonies & Polaroids

this week's whingy wednesdays comes a little tardier than i'd hoped and i expect will be somewhat shorter than the posts you may have become accustomed to. i'm finding life as a pregnant woman much easier these days and i've notably calmed down somewhat. i'm even enjoying this pregnancy gig now so i'll find it tough to come up with some things to whinge about......but i'm not totally devoid of complaint......

*bladder* yes. i am still getting up for far more pees than i care to think about and my uterus is most definitely NOT sitting on my bladder anymore. i've come to the [pretty obvious] conclusion that i just have a pathetic bladder.

*baby movements* really my only complaint here is that scrobble doesn't move as much as i'd like. feeling your baby wriggling around inside of you is [a weird but..] lovely feeling. it reminds you it's there. and sometimes you do forget [until you try to bend down to polish the tv stand and realise that there's a good reason pregnant women aren't very flexible. bebe's movements are slowly turning into pretty defined kicks but the child is taking it's merry time and isn't particularly active. i have a feeling this child may have similar sporting capabilities and level of interest as me. ie none. why stand when you can sit? why run when you can walk??

*hair* ick. ack. ugh. my hair is vile. a rotten, bushy, knotty, dry mess. pregnancy hasn't favoured my hair in the slightest and i'm kinda looking forward to that baldness some new moms experience. really.

*hairiness* in case you were wondering, my stomach is still worryingly hairy. i'm DEFINITELY looking forward to any baldness in this vicinity.

*boobs* i have one question. when will they stop? i'm hiding a rack that nigella lawson would be proud of underneath these grotty, ill-fitting tshirts. still, this is barely a complaint.

how soon is too soon?

we've been lucky enough to inherit a few pieces of baby ephemera from very generous friends and family - with plenty more where that came from to come!

mostly we've been accumulating practical items that are more pregnancy related, leaving the more exciting baby stuff for a little later on in the pregnancy. but during the last 19 weeks i've seen many beautiful temptations that we've resisted for fear it's 'too early' to buy.

i understand why people wait to buy things for their baby and i too felt it was pertinent to wait at least a little while before we made any purchases. and after 17 weeks of waiting i decided that it was time.

we didn't go crazy, just a couple of babygrows, but as soon as we brought those tiny little clothes home i realised that by waiting so long to make any purchases i'd actually been denying myself the opportunity to embrace the future. i found it entirely cathartic to see the tiny little clothes hanging from my bedroom door. it was a brief glimpse into our future and it actually really helped me put some of the anxieties i was feeling about impending parenthood to bed.

i'm beginning to feel like a mum. assessing each item, feeling just how soft that cotton will feel against scrobble's skin. i see these tiny little clothes and realise that one day, the little baby inside me will join us out here in the real world. he/she will sit inside those clothes, like he/she is sitting inside of this huge outfit - that is my belly - right now.

i'm going to make damn sure that scrobble is comfy as can be in both outfits.

***

painfully cute babygrows from h&m. sadly not available online.